I have a very annoying habit of wanting to move into a new place at least 4 months before our current lease is up. I did it once in Charlotte and I just did it again a few weeks ago here in California. I think it has something to do with spring--the days get longer and the weather is nicer and I dream about living in a house with a big open kitchen; a yard that's fenced in for Ender to frolic about; and now that we're in California, a fruit tree of some kind or maybe a rose bush (or maybe even both).

So I get on Craigslist or Zillow and start looking, and suddenly every house I encounter becomes The House, and we have to go look at it immediately and should we get sub-leasers or look into just breaking our current lease? Poor Rob tags along with me to look at one or two places, and my intensity becomes so extreme that we both forget how stupid it would be to break a lease that only has four months left on it.

Luckily this time we decided to take a deep breath and just wait; and I came out of my frenzy a few days later kind of embarrassed about the woman who looked at The Tiniest House in San Jose and was willing to keep her dresser in the garage and take a door off its hinges in order to fit her bed in the bedroom.

That actually happened.

The next day we went to San Mateo to look at one more place before deciding officially to wait until September to do another tour, and the house was perfect except that Caltrain was too far away and there were no shuttle stops for Rob to get to work and the timing was just really off. It had a big backyard with tons of roses and plenty of room for Ender to run around, it was in our budget and had a little dining nook that we could use as an office, and the kitchen was large enough that we could put our dinner table (which we never actually use) in it. The bedrooms were large enough to hold a bed and some furniture. And then there was a Meyer lemon tree right off the front patio, from which I plucked one perfect, juicy lemon on our way back to the car. 

When I was younger my family lived in Redwood City and I used to cross the street and go to my best friend Whitney's house. We would splash around in the pool and run around the side of the house, picking the Meyer lemons from the front yard; peeling and eating them like oranges. The smell of those lemons was so distinct, and so different from the regular ones you buy at the supermarket that as I sat there in the passenger seat of our car, I breathed it in again and remembered the sort of surreal detail that I've been here before--this is not my first time living in the Bay Area. 

Sometimes on our way somewhere, without meaning to we'll drive by my old house and I'll remember exactly how it felt to stand in that front yard, to cross the street to Whitney's house for lemons and mac n' cheese, the way the lion statues in the park felt as I ran my tiny hands across their stone manes and tails.

I have spent a lot of the past 8 months rebelling against the fact that we're here for the long term, and I still find myself daydreaming about moving back to Charlotte, to a small city that's manageable and friendly and I can run into people I love by accident at the coffee shop. But the fact of the matter is that we don't live in Charlotte anymore, and whether it feels like it or not at times, the Bay Area is our home now. 

I have a small group of friends in town and an extended family nearby, a new routine that includes so much Pure Barre (and when it comes to the blog hopefully a lot more writing and cooking), and in four months maybe we'll be in a house with a yard where Ender can splash around in the sprinkler and run around the side of the house on a hot day as I sit in the sun, peeling and eating a Meyer lemon like an orange; the same way I did back then.

For months, Rob and I have been looking forward to spending a few days celebrating our anniversary in Santa Barbara. It's been a crazy few weeks for us (we haven't been home for a weekend since the end of March!), and even though it felt a little weird to pack up the car and drop Ender off at daycare yet again, it was pretty nice to get away just the two of us with no real plans to do anything but explore a place that was 100% new to both of us.

We decided to drive from the Bay Area so we could stop in Monterey. I've been a Death Cab for Cutie fan for as long as I can remember and ever since I heard the song Bixby Canyon Bridge, I've dreamed about seeing it in person. Then Big Little Lies came out and the bridge was in the opening credits, so I got even more excited about driving over it. It was a little out of the way, but totally worth it, and we stopped for lunch on the water in Monterey, which is always super nice.

The weather in Santa Barbara over the weekend wasn't great (mostly cold and windy with some rain), but we had a great time. Here are a few details:

Where we stayed: the Santa Barbara Inn. It was a bit of a splurge, but the rooms were lovely with big beautiful patios, the pool is heated, and the restaurant downstairs has an okay complimentary breakfast and a really nice happy hour every afternoon. It's right across the street from the beach so we'd take long walks in the afternoon and then go right to the bar for a drink and a snack. We had one sunny day so we spent that afternoon swimming in the pool, which was really fun.

Where we ate: 

• Convivo (the restaurant in our hotel): We were so tired the night we got in that we ordered a pizza and dessert and ate in bed. One other night we accidentally had dinner there because we ordered so many snacks at happy hour that we were too full to eat anything else. The pizzas were really good and they had these delicious lamb meatballs on the menu, which I loved even though I usually don't care for lamb very much. The margaritas at happy hour were $5 and super tasty.
• East Beach Tacos: This is a cute little taco place that's attached to a batting cage. We ate here twice as well, for lunch on our second day and then before we left town on Sunday afternoon. The guacamole is some of the best I've ever had, and you can get any 3 tacos for $9, which was perfect for me and Rob. I had a grilled fish taco the first time and the grilled shrimp on the second visit. They were both incredible. And because it shares a parking lot with the batting cage, they also serve burgers and hot dogs and a kid's meal quesadilla, which I found really charming.
• Brophy Bros: Rob and I were so into this place--it reminded us of a California version of this bar we used to go to in Charlottesville (that's The Virginian for any of you Wahoos). It's small and cozy with a really cool bar, and there's a patio over the harbor that we waited a little bit longer for.
• McConnell's Ice Cream: So good! I got banana salted caramel (that was one flavor) and pistachio amaretto. The banana caramel was definitely my favorite. Rob got a milkshake and he loved it so much that we ended up coming back that same day after dinner for an ice cream sandwich (his) and a hot chocolate (mine). 
• Loquita: I would go back to this place in a heartbeat. We decided to go late on Saturday night and luckily made a reservation--it was packed! Our table was outside, which I would have loved but it was super windy and kind of cold. Luckily they had lots of heat lamps out there and every chair was equipped with a fleece blanket. We were still a little chilly, but it was a nice touch, and it definitely helped. We ordered a couple drinks and shared the chicken and chorizo paella, patatas bravas, and gambas al ajillo. The food and cocktails were amazing and the whole vibe there was super romantic--perfect for an anniversary dinner (although I'd go again no matter the occasion).

I'm sure it's clear to you guys by now that all we really do when we travel is eat, but you can also find us walking 5-7 miles a day, taking afternoon naps, and watching whatever crappy television is on in the room at night. So...yeah, I guess we're just in it for the food.

If you've been to Santa Barbara, what were your favorite spots? I think we'll definitely be back!

Last Sunday Rob and I flew back to California from North Carolina. We landed at SFO and it was rainy and grey and really chilly, especially after spending four days in the already muggy spring that comes so early to Charlotte. I wrapped my jacket tighter around my body--the one I bought last summer as a get excited, you're moving to the Bay Area present. It's olive green and has an army vibe with gold details that look great with my otherwise neutral wardrobe. I never managed to get overly excited about moving to the Bay Area, but the jacket helped.

We were both so tired from several days packed full of food and friends, so when we landed we were kind of dazed. We wanted dinner and to go to bed, so after our Uber dropped us off at home we put our bags in the living room and I called the Chinese place down the street. I used to joke that you don't live somewhere until you have your takeout place down the street figured out, and I thought about that as I placed our very usual order of General Tso's chicken and rice noodles, and the guy on the other end of the phone responded with recognition. 

There are tiny moments that creep in when you move somewhere new, and slowly but surely they start to create a feeling of home. The California ones are fewer and farther between, but driving down El Camino Real on a rainy night to pick up Chinese food is certainly one of them. It reminded me of those quiet rituals that felt so new at first but now define the cities we used to live in--walking around Lake Harriet on a snowy day, drinking almond milk lattes at Spyhouse while I wrote essays for the blog and thank-you cards after my bridal shower. I used to walk over to the Minneapolis Institute of Art from the coffee shop and crunch through the snow, getting a little emotional over the wide steps leading up to the columns.

Then there was light rail from South End to Uptown and 7th Street Market for lunch, walking to Atherton Market or watching The Bachelor in my friend Paige's apartment. Sunday doggie playdates in the backyard and Vietnamese takeout, s'mores on the grill, and cortaditos from Smelly Cat. One of the first times I really felt like I lived in Charlotte involved, believe it or not, Chinese takeout on a rainy day--it was a weekend and we had no plans so I walked down the street from our South End apartment to the place we had started to get used to, and I walked home with a brown bag full of General Tso's chicken and rice noodles, wearing the waterproof boots that used to keep me warm in Minneapolis.

But you've heard this all before:

September 2014 | December 2014

January 2015 | April 2015

January 2017 | February 2017

Maybe one day the things that will make me feel at home will be different. Perhaps they'll turn into California things: palm trees and sandy beaches with wild waves crashing, or the crowded streets of San Francisco and the way grapevines look in the early evening light. The drive to Half Moon Bay to visit my aunt is already becoming more and more familiar every time we do it, but I still think it's safe to say that no matter where I am, I can always count on a rainy day and an order of noodles to bring me back where we are, where we've been, and where we one day might end up staying.