I poured iced coffee into a jar yesterday afternoon and thought about Virginia.

It was 40 degrees and sunny outside, and my apartment was clean and I had fresh tulips sitting on the table, still waiting to fully bloom. I love living in Minneapolis, I really do. There's something about the city and the people and the food that makes me feel extremely understood.

But I don't have anyone to run with here, no one to drop by for tea on a random afternoon. These past six and a half months with Rob have truly felt like a blessing--like a chance to make up for the time we might have lost over the year that we were so far from one another--but there are days where I think we both would love to just have one or two of our best friends around for drinks or a laid-back weekend brunch.

I know that at some point, I will have to stop fantasizing about the time I spent as a student, because there is never going to be another time where all of my friends can drop what they're doing to just hang out. Shawna and I won't always just have an hour or two in the middle of the afternoon to meet for coffee, or decide to drink a pitcher of mimosas on a porch, or go on a quick run down our favorite trail in Charlottesville. There isn't a realistic new version of the story where Tina and her sister and I go to lunch and then spend the rest of the afternoon all cuddled up together in my bed, watching some episode of Grey's Anatomy.

But these are my favorite memories--the ones where I meet my mom for lunch every day and hang out with my dad on the lake every weekend; where almost all of the people I love are just an arm's reach away. I carry them with me everywhere I go, to every place I'll ever call home. And maybe one day, I can return to that world for good and put them down on a mantle somewhere, where they will be safe and I can start to make new ones.

Minneapolis might understand me, but Virginia knows me.

This post is in response to the following prompt: "What's been on your mind? What have you carried and gnawed over?" (From Old Friend from Far Away, page 154.) If you've written a response of your own, please share it below in the comments! 

P.S. Visit this post for next week's prompt.

Nobody ever told me how hard it would be to make friends after college. Maybe you're working a weird job and have nothing in common with your colleagues. Maybe you went to grad school and took half of your courses online; or maybe, shortly after, you met a handful of wonderful people at your office but then moved to Minnesota a year later.

I have always been blessed with great friends. When I get married in a few months, I'll have seven amazing women standing right behind me, and I feel like much of my life has been that way. Emma is the sister I never had, Tina is the one I can always count on, Shawna has the most amazing spirit and can make me laugh like no one else, and Elena and I have been separated by oceans at times, but always manage to find our way back to each other. These women have been in my life since we were girls, but the list goes on (and isn't limited only to my wedding party). I think about all the people who will be seated there as Rob and I stand in front of them, and I just can't believe it. It's overwhelming in the very best way.

This is all wonderful, but these people live really far away, which is why I've found myself meeting up with wonderful strangers in coffee shops and restaurants lately. I've been dating a lot of girls over the past few months.

The internet has been sort of amazing in bringing us all together. Someone who once read my blog when I was writing my master's thesis in Charlottesville is now the person I refer to as "my best friend in Minneapolis." An Instagram connection and I are going to start our own little writing group. Food bloggers and photographers who I never knew until October, or yesterday, are now people with whom I make plans. Blogging has really made this big world (or country, or state, really) a lot smaller, and for that I'm thankful.

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I wrote this a while ago:

I remember leaving for college.

I stood in my driveway with Emma's arms wrapped around my neck and thought, "Never." I would never find another friend like her, and I would never be the same because of it. It was August and despite the early hour, the hot Virginia morning already fell, muggy on our bare shoulders. Thick brown ringlets and freckles merged as our embrace tightened. 

My dad put the final box of my stuff into the back of our black Suburban. "I'll visit you every weekend," she sobbed into my ear. I let go of her and got in the car. I remember feeling like I'd never have another friend like Emma again.

And then, seven years later, she was hugging me goodbye once more as I packed my stuff to move to Minnesota. So much has changed, but a lot has stayed the same. You can't replace your best friends, but you don't have to be alone.

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Photo: Me, Shawna, and Emma in Charlottesville, Virginia.

Blurry, but one of my very favorites.

We're back! I didn't pick up my camera as much as I thought I would when I was home for Christmas. My time in Virginia was spent with family, friends, and more food than I think I've ever eaten at once. It was just huge meals and fun cocktails for like six straight days. It's crazy that I won't be back again until March, but I'm so glad I got to spend two weeks for Thanksgiving last month and ten days for Christmas. Spending time at home with my family is always really nice.

Now it's back to regularly scheduled life--so bear with me for a few days while I get to my emails and resume regular posting! Hope you all had very happy holidays.