Dear Sophie,

You're almost three months old now; sometimes it feels like exactly that short a time but often it feels as though you've always been here.

I'm sitting on the couch, pumping as you nap; stealing away some time with my laptop as you sway back and forth in the Rock N Play beside me. You always fall asleep when you're nursing and I still mostly hold you while you nap, staring at your face and running my fingers through your hair, which is the exact same color as your dad's beard. I’ve been trying to put you down more often so I can get a few things done but sometimes (most of the time) I just want to have you close.

At night when I'm in bed and you're still in the living room with Rob, I swipe through pictures of you on my phone and marvel at how much you've changed from the day you were born, the day we brought you home, the day before this one. You grow and learn and grab things and I swear to God the other day you laughed, although you haven't done it again since then.

You're finally sleeping for some longer stretches at night, which means your dad and I actually get to sleep next to each other again. For weeks we took turns holding you and passing each other in the hallway between our bedroom and the living room at 3AM, but this morning I woke up with you still sleeping in the bassinet beside me and your dad curled up against my back and I couldn't believe how lucky I am to have this life and to know this kind of love.

The other day I came across a quote and now I can't remember where I saw it or who said it, but it was something to the effect of this: I love you so much that sometimes I don't even think I can bear it, and then I realize that there are so many other people out there in the world going about their days, quietly harboring the same intense love for their children. It really is the most incredible thing.

I knew you'd change my life and my self, Sophie Ray. I just didn't realize how much or how fast.

I love you to the moon and back,

Megan (Mom)

Happy Friday! I'm back with another recipe from my new cookbook today (and in case you missed it, I answered some reader questions earlier this week right here). This zucchini spaghetti and meatballs is one of my favorite easy comfort food recipes made Paleo, and it's perfect for a cozy weekend at home with family or friends! 

Ingredients:

For the meatballs:

• 1 pound ground beef
• Half of a small white onion, chopped
• 1/2 cup chopped fresh parsley
• 3 garlic cloves, minced
• 1 large egg, beaten
• 1/2 teaspoon dried basil
• 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
• 1-2 tablespoons olive oil

For the sauce and zoodles:

• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 1 small white onion, chopped
• 2 garlic cloves, minced
• 1 16-18 oz can or jar of diced tomatoes with juice (no sugar added)
• 1/2 to 1 teaspoon red pepper flakes
• 3-4 large zucchini, spiralized
• Salt and pepper, to taste
• 1 tablespoon fresh chopped parsley, for garnish

Instructions:

1. In a large bowl, combine the beef, onion, parsley, garlic, egg, basil, and oregano. Season with salt and pepper and mix well. Roll into meatballs using your hands, then carefully add them to a large skillet over medium heat with the olive oil.
2. Brown the meatballs on all sides, turning every couple of minutes. Transfer the meatballs to a paper towel-lined plate and set aside.
3. In the same skillet over medium heat, heat the olive oil. Sauté the onion and garlic for 2-3 minutes, or until the garlic is fragrant and the onion is softened slightly.
4. Add the tomatoes with their juice and the red pepper flakes. Bring to a low simmer and add the meatballs back in. Cover and cook for another 5-7 minutes, or until the meatballs are cooked through.
5. Add the zucchini noodles to the skillet and toss gently to combine everything together. Remove from the heat, season with salt and pepper, and serve immediately, garnished with the parsley.

Tip: Add some grated Parmesan cheese to this dish as a topping if you aren't dairy-free or Paleo.

This post is brought to you in partnership with Rockridge Press.

Has it really been over a year since I've done one of these posts? I've been saving up some reader questions to answer, so today I'm going to do just that.

What do you miss most when you're not blogging?

I definitely haven't been blogging as much as I used to (or even as much as I hoped to after Sophie got here), and I think the thing I miss the most during this time off is just sitting down to write--it doesn't have to be a full essay, even just a quick list of things I believe right now or answering questions like this one. Instagram has been great for filling that desire to share, since it can be done a lot faster and without having to sit down at a computer.

Since you identify as an introvert, how do you maintain a healthy relationship with social media?

I love this question--people are often surprised when I tell them I'm an introvert, but it couldn't be more true. I think social media and blogging has been great for me because it allows me to put myself out there in ways I otherwise wouldn't--like there's a shield between me and the world that allows me to share with more confidence. I'm almost embarrassed when people I actually know in real life read my blog. Sometimes it feels easier to write for strangers.

As far as a healthy relationship with social media goes, I try really hard to be aware of how much I need the gratification from likes and comments and all that. I'd be lying if I said I didn't refresh Instagram too many times throughout the day, hoping for that acceptance. It can be exhausting. Taking a step back every now and then and reminding myself that I don't have to share every detail has been a good thing for me, even if it's easier said than done.

What are some things you wish you'd known before about birth or the first few weeks at home with a baby? Any advice for other first-time moms?

Surprisingly enough, Rob and I didn't take any birth classes, and I tried to actually limit my reading about labor and delivery. I felt really strongly that whatever was meant to happen would happen, and that my body was going to do what it needed to do. It helped to have my aunt as our doula, because I kind of went in blind. I knew what to expect on a very basic level, but I got too anxious when I tried to hammer out the details. 

I still barely know anything about being a mom, so I guess my advice for others is to keep your expectations low and just roll with it. You probably won't sleep very much at first and that's just how it is. But you'll figure it out a little more each day.

(I've gotten lots of requests for more motherhood posts: my breastfeeding experience, birth story, etc. and I'm working on them! Thank you all so much for your interest and questions.)

How is Ender adjusting to the baby, and what did you do to prep him for the transition?

He's doing really well! Ender is a sweet but pretty anxious, high-energy dog, so we were a little worried about him with Sophie, but he really seems to like her and want to be near her as much as he can. We started going to a private trainer every week a few months before our due date and worked on obedience and agility training, which interestingly enough helped Ender trust us more as his leaders.

We also stopped letting him on the furniture the whole month before Sophie got here, and we originally intended to keep it that way but changed our minds when we came home from the hospital. The trainer wants all his clients to keep their dogs off the bed and couch, but to us it felt more important to remind Ender that he's still part of the family even though we have a baby.

He sleeps in his crate because she's in a bassinet on our bed and I don't feel comfortable letting him be out and about if we're asleep and she's available to him (he loves licking her and it freaks me out). We never leave him unattended with her and if I have to go to the bathroom or throw some laundry in I put her in her crib, which is currently in the living room and high enough that he can't get to her (although he usually ends up staying on the couch or will lie down on the ground next to the crib).

I take him on a walk every day and try to run with him a few times a week. He's so much more well behaved when he gets enough exercise, so that's a big priority for us.

We'll see how he does as she gets more mobile and starts making more noises--she babbles a lot now and he was freaked out at first but is getting much more used to it. Poor pup--babies change so fast that sometimes it feels like he's getting used to a new thing every day! But he's doing great and I'm so proud of him.

Thank you all for your questions--I love answering them! If you have more, feel free to leave a comment or shoot me an email and I'll include them in a future post! You can also DM me on Instagram.